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i am gods favorite cup of tea.......

Sometime back a friend of mine sent an sms saying, "the true flavor of a tea is tested when put in hot water. So if you are feeling gloomy today, shed it are God's own favorite cup of tea" .......Oh my God! it surely did put a smile on my face.
Osho had said somewhere once that heaven and hell are not geographical places... they are our states of mind. WE create them. I only realised the truth of the statement these last six- seven months.
I have visited this place called hell and its a very nasty place to spend a lifetime.....And nobody enters with you there and nobody ever can pull you out from this place.
I have cried, I have gone crazy, miserable, frustrated, anxious, tense and cried all over again...I did a lot of brooding on my imagined past bad karmas ....nothing helped. I stopped my meditations.
And then one day as if it was a miracle I pulled myself out of it.
Now I am back. Thank you my blogger friends ....each one of you... I am not mentioning the names here because so many of my friends wrote to me ....thank you so much for writing to me on my mail or the blogger and letting me know that though we may have never seen each other, though we may be having different national identities... there is something which keeps everyone connected.
And I am really happy to be back amongst you all. And I never want to get back to that place again. I may be still standing on the doorway...I dont know....maybe I havent run too far but definitely I have my back towards it... waiting for the big leap....ha ha ha that surely is a dream I watch every-day.
And thank you so much Osho for telling me this : "This is your life. If you laugh, you laugh. If you cry, you else is responsible for you. You alone are responsible for everything in your life."


Pradip Biswas said…
Thank you for this wonderful write up. I am possibly much elder to you and I saw both hell and Heaven. Once during a punishment session my N.C.C teacher said "well I can not reduce your punishment but take this odycolon sprayed napkin with you, you shall be relieved when your sweat and tiredness shall be the maximum. You are right, hell and heaven are located inside our mind. Hell is meant to correct you, heaven is the solace for your life.If you have corected yourself completly you never need to visit hell but if not be ready for the next semestar. And more you correct yourself your duration ticket at heaven is for a longer period. Hell and heaven are just like hot sun and shadow, they repeat in life you can only choose to adjust your duration by the corrective measures you take.
Visit my blog sometimes
Happy new year to you, too. It takes enormous courage to confront hell and come out of it. Glad that you could make it back. Missed you in the past few months. Pradip's comment was also very perceptive, as was your heart-wrenching post. To echo your blog title : "Ah, woman!"
Vigneshwar said…
nice post
The Rebel said…
You are Right.Its the Mind that judges the situation or surroundings and labels it as good n evil.A Person with Inner Peace hardly gets worked up by the Mind!!
Jackie said…

You're back! I am sooo happy to have your blog again. I missed your spirit. And while we might have never met - we are connected like lost sisters -who somehow seemed to have found eachother.

Wishing you a much better 2009 - away from the hell that keeps seeming to pop up randomly...
get zapped said…
A terrific post about hope and tenacity! It's so rewarding when we decide to change our perspective and live a different life. I did this too, I said to myself that "you had to change my attitude and wow - it worked! Of course, it's a regular meditation, but what isn't?

HapPy NeW YeaR!
Devika said…
Hi Jyotsana

I am in no way an Osho fan.
I think I myself could well say all that you've quoted...don't really see anything great there..they are true, though..

btw, I too was living a kind of hell...But after coming to the blogging, I think I have gained more clarity for myself, communicating and knowing other bloggers...

Get Zapped is one of them, I am happy to see her here...

Ofcourse blogworld has its own ways of working, and it is really really hard to know a human mind and its workings through a few written words...

One needs to be sure of oneself the most...

That was a nice one to read and to know you..

jyotsana said…
hi devika,
thanks for visiting me here.
this blog is not about osho's is more about you and me. and i do not write because i hve something great to say.....but because i love to express myself the way i am.
osho's words may not be always very important tho i am an osho sannyasi is his presence which is very precious even tho he is not in his body anymore.
to me he is an enlightened guru. i feel a world for him....because he is always by my side.... and i never judge his words for their greatness...i accept them for their truth.
it is not important whether i could hve said that or is important that the source from where these words come are not the mind but the no-mind.
also i do not aspire to be an intellectual.... i just want to live my life
twicedoubleyou said…
Welcome back!
Wouldn't like to miss your powerful words! Thank you.
This will be your (our) year!
Osho is so true, I guess I feel the same about him more or the less..but I would suggest to follow only Your path- as he had always emphasized on... And I read you made a start with that! :-)
Kate said…
Hi Jyotsna, Firstly thank you for joining my followers, having had a quick look this morning through your blog I am in awe of your artistic ability, your pictures are soo beautiful. I tried to link to your site as a follower - but the system wouldn't allow it for some reason - so I'll add your blog to my list and check your blog that way..

Cheers+Hugs from Scotland, Kate x.
Jaquanda Rae said…
hey jyotsana, btw i love your name, it's very pretty. thanks for commenting on my post, it's means so much to me. I'm so glad you made it back fine on the other side. Congrats girl!
Beatrice V said…
Jyotsana, that is a lovely picture! Glad to see you are back on the blog, I am just back from a long trip myself, and inundated with chores so haven't fully read this posting, but thanks for passing by, and a very happy new year.
Devika said…
Hi Jyotsana,

Forgot to respond here, after doing it at mine...

My dear, please don't be too serious with my comments..I just write out my first impression after I read a post..

Even my poetry is that way..I seldom do much of an editing or correcting..

Hope you understand me, dear Jyotsana...

i came to read a new one...
will come later :)

love, always
Sayani said…
hi and "Muahh"
u are so enigmatic ....

i loved this post as usual and may be u r absence did create a void somewhere bt am glad u re back

keep rocking :)

PS:- An nt in facebook :(
but soon i will :)
Lynda Lehmann said…
How true are Osho's words, and your own words, as well! We make our own realities. We cannot change what happens to us, but only how we deal with it.

I'm very happy to hear that you're feeling better and in a brighter place!

Peace to you, Sister.
Pri said…
hi...someone has left a dedication to u at my blog--"nostalgic moments" come over and check it out :)

seeya around
Anonymous said…
I think oprah did this

Here is a great article i found about
the acai berrys. I didnt know about this
stuff and wish i had along time ago. Hope
this helps.
Keshi said…
WB then!

I must be God's fav cup of Coffee...cos He's the one who's enjoying while Im being gulped down! ;-)

Sayani said…

thanks for that beautiful song ...

okay i must have said u earlier ...
first i thought to dedicate am alive and second thought was that's the way it is i dedicated both ...both my fav :)

twicedoubleyou said…
This comment has been removed by the author.
twicedoubleyou said…
Hi Jyotsana, THANK U for the comment u left on Pri's blog- which is a great initiative by the way-! I feel honored and have send Pri one of my favorite songs/artist... (Antony and the Johnsons, check U-tube)
With love
Eye! said…
Thanks for your writings and sharing all this.

Such a wonderful piece! so, thank YOU!

Perhaps we should say;

I am my own favourite cup of tea! :)
david mcmahon said…
Welcome back - and remember that you have the supreme power to dictate the course of your own life.

Yes, I know a lot about tea - I went to school in Darjeeling!
Jyoti said…

I can somewhere connect to your words or you can say the theme of writeup was something which am trying to put in words but couldn't do that.

Welcome back and wish you a great year ahead.
Jackie said…
I loved the dedication! Thank you SO much! It made my day! Shukria Jyotsana. You are the best Sista!
Smita Tewari said…
It, surely helped to read your article, but my enlarged heart condition stems from a genetic history. & there's not much I can do about it...
Smita Ma'am.
luckysanjana said…
hey in sure glad you got back........I know hell is not a great place to be......gee lady didnt you see me in the corner there ??? ive been there these past couple of years and it was mightly unpleasant you know why i was absounding....Im tryin to get my life back......keeping myself busy is the key..........and ive made some goals for myself and im working towards themmmmmmmmmand yes the sadness stilllingers in the back of my head . it probably will never go away........but hey imlearning to live with it........
Hey both of us got out of there now well make sure we wont get back there again.
Smita Tewari said…
I am so happy for you, Jyotsana, that you have come out of it! Nothing lasts, not even sorrow.
So whenever you're feeling low, remind yourself- 'this, too, shall pass.'
And you're braver than most, have the courage of conviction to move on, not just not look back!

Besides, you have Osho- your strenghth...
Nikhil Kumar said…
Jyotsna Ji,
Hell and heaven are unmistakably the states of mind. Sri Aurobindo, too, on his yogic plane of consciousness has discovered that consciousness is the basic thing in existence.
I would like to make it clear that consciousness and mind are not the same. Mind is a form of consciousness. In the human mind we can ascend the spiritual and supramental planes of consciousness.
rohini said…
the post was exceptionally interesting where one experinces bth heaven n hell...gr8 luved it
manpret kapor said…
Those must know before list is really helpful...thanks for having it posted.

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